LPS #376

By Allison Elizabeth

Have you ever settled in Catan? It’s a magical city of labour and industry and your dad and me. I told you three sheep for one steel. Your dad must have felt bad for me when we handed each other sheep at the same time. The way you questioned my intelligence and later refused to teach me how to play chess because you wanted to win. 

Graphic by Nicole Nguyen

YOUR DAD: I think next summer we might get some sheep to graze in the backyard.

ME: Are you sure you’re not actually going to get one steel?

YOUR DAD: No, I’m thinking of ones you could sheer and spin wool from. The kind you always want to buy.

I have no idea what he’s talking about. The sheep I see are better for traumatic brain injury research than they are for collecting materials. You are familiar with the flick of your finger on their heads every time you see them on my windowsill. 

ME: Someone ought to do that to your head.

YOU: Do you not love me?

Wow. Out of left field, I thought. But also, a great observation. If I were thinking properly and selfishly it would have been pinned back on you. You always wanted to fight and I didn't. Conversations destroyed by narrowing the path before you step foot on it. No room for the sheep to roam.

ME: Can I not also love my sheep?

YOU: They make me feel obsolete. 

I had stopped offering to pick him up coffee on the way to his house. I had to save the $5 for number #376. She goes for $115 and is the final piece I need for my collection.

ME: Why won’t you teach me how to play chess?

YOU: Why can’t you learn how to properly do trades in Catan?

I never understood why this was such a big deal. We always figured it out after it happened. Did pretending to be colonizers actually hold that much value in your life? I have never held a strategy when I played a game. I am simply there to roll the dice, move my pieces, collect my sheep, and have a good time. 

ME: How many sheep will fit in your backyard?

YOU: Not enough to teach you how to play a game.

ME: I know how to play games. I can strategize.

YOU: You can only strategize how to expand your littlest pet shop sheep collection.

ME: Your dad thinks I have real sheep.

YOU: He thinks much higher of you than you actually are.

I don’t understand why you had to be so mean to me. No matter how loudly you would yell at me for not knowing the rules of the games I would always sit quietly, not wanting to continue something I found pointless. 

ME: I have to go home. My mom is calling me.

YOU: Okay, I love you.

ME: Yeah. You too.

I went to my car and went on ebay, placed a bid on #376. The seller got back to me immediately.

SELLER: Hey this might be kind of weird, but I was wondering if you would be interested in the barter system?

ME: Lol what would you want to trade for?

SELLER: Steel, but I’m open to exchange wheat. 

ME: You’re the one with the sheep, right?

I gave her wheat from the farm by my house. I went in the middle of the night under the protection of the starlight. I placed the wheat in an envelope and sealed it with a kiss. When I recieved #376 in the mail I thought, this wasn’t hard at all. I sent her a thank you message.

ME: #376 is here safe and sound. If you have anymore I would be open to barter with you again!

SELLER: glad to hear :-) I have #585, what do you have to offer?

ME: Any interest in playing chess?

There’s no point of playing a game without knowing the rules. There’s no sheep I’d like to sheer over the sound of unrequited bickering. I took a picture of #376 and traded you in my memories. I’ll never settle for Catan.